Summer, swimsuits, body image and my favorite fluff recipe
hey y’all!! i’m already dreading the Texas humidity and it’s only May. Yesterday it was a high of 88, but felt like 98. We do this every year, we hope for Spring and hope it lingers into June. It usually doesn’t and my thoughts go straight to October, hurry up. Get here!! I didn’t love Summers because I started working early in life, and my weeks and weekends were filled with waiting on tables. I let that be a damaged narrative for a very long time. I let the cafe stop me from doing because I lived in guilt of, “I have to be here and I want to please my family.” I let it become my identity at an early age. I was also consumed with my body image and wouldn’t wear shorts or sleeve less shirts. I was so worried about what everyone else thought and I would cover myself up. I was literally dying from the suffocation of the lie and all the clothing. I only wore swimsuits that sucked it all in, were black and my granny could borrow. I then covered that up with shorts and a shirt. I remember the day. I was running across 237 to the cafe from our house. A boy a year older than me yelled from the gas station, “look at that fat F#@( run.” or “'i’d date you if you were skinnier.” That was 30 years ago and I remember those words like it was yesterday. The words don’t sting so much anymore as I’ve come to learn that my size doesn’t make me who I am on the inside. I love myself for me. I love myself because God created me and He gave me free will to eat ice cream with my kiddos. He’s also given me free will to make healthier choices, and I have. I now wear the cutest red and white polka dot tankini and get the craziest amount of compliments. Those are the words I remember now. Oh my goodness! You look precious. In the end, that’s all that matters. That I know what my Father thinks of me and I’m precious in His eyes.
Now to my favorite summer treat, because let’s be real, nobody turns the oven on in Texas during July. And, the memories of this treat bring me back to simpler times around the dinner table with my family. It doesn't have to be fancy to make a memory…
1 large container of Cool Whip, don’t skimp and get the off brand
1 large box of Instant Jello Pistachio Pudding
1 large can of Crushed Pineapple…don’t get the chunks
Mix it all together, chill for an hour & eat the whole bowl!!